If Your Wife Only Knew Read online

  Being vulnerable about the tragedies of life, love, and broken relationships wasn’t easy. But Rashad had been nothing but supportive after she shared her past.

  Even so, she had questions.

  “Rashad, I want to ask you something.”

  “Shoot.”

  “I’m happy about everything . . . all this. But I am shocked you brought me here . . . What if—?”

  “She’s far away from here today.”

  “Okay, I figured that. But what if you see anybody else you know? How would you explain . . . ?”

  “I don’t worry about that. I ain’t doing nothing. Just taking a special client out for her birthday. That’s all.”

  “Are you serious?”

  “People need to mind they own business. Plus, do you see any black people on this boat?” They laughed.

  “That’s silly, but I get what you’re trying to say. I want to make sure you’re okay with being out here like this with me.”

  “Do you want to be with me out here?”

  “There’s no other place I’d want to be . . . except with you, Rashad.”

  “Then that’s what’s up.”

  Right before the ferry reached the Bolivar Peninsula, they climbed back into his sedan. After they docked at Seawolf Park, Rashad drove off and ended up settling at an area where people were casting fishing rods. He found a semi-private section on the beach and set up foldable travel chairs. He unfolded the chairs and invited her to sit down and relax.

  “You think of everything, don’t you?”

  “Not all the time.”

  “Then this makes me feel even more special.”

  “That’s ’cause you are.”

  “Are you blowing smoke up my ass?”

  He couldn’t do anything except laugh. It made Rashad feel good to treat her special on this day. He thought of himself as a good man, and his actions were just what a good man does.

  Rashad surprised Nicole again when he opened his trunk and lifted out a small cooler filled with beer, bottled water, and ginger ale, Nicole’s favorite. They feasted on deli sandwiches, a carton of strawberries, and tiny bags of chips, and talked for an hour.

  Rashad decided to tell a joke.

  “Did you ever hear about this Christian chick who always told everybody, ‘It’s just me and Jesus, it’s just me and Jesus’? Well, early one morning, a fire broke out at this chick’s house. Her neighbors gathered in the street watching the flames shoot from her roof. They worried. They prayed. And when they saw the woman running out the front door in her bathrobe, and noticed a butt-naked man following her, somebody said, ‘Welp, there goes Jesus.’”

  “Ah ha ha, Rashad. That was corny, but cute.”

  “Oh, here’s another one. What did Jay-Z call his girlfriend before they got married? Feyoncé. Get it?”

  “Ha ha, that wasn’t very funny.”

  “But you’re laughing. I like when I can make you laugh.”

  Nicole was having so much fun she didn’t want their time together to end. At one point, she hopped on his back and placed her arms securely around his neck. He broke off into a sprint and she screamed when he ran around galloping like a wild horse and acting as if he was going to let her fall.

  “Don’t worry,” he assured her. “I got you, Nicky.”

  Later on, Rashad stood up and stretched his legs. “Okay, I can tell you’re getting bored. We should be headed back.”

  “I’m not bored with you, Rashad. I love everything about this day. We get along so well.”

  “I’m a good guy.”

  “I wish you were an available guy.”

  He raised one eyebrow. “Why is that?”

  “The good ones are always taken. And it seems so unfair. Seems like there are a lot more bad ones out there, the ones that don’t mean a woman any good. They mainly just want a bump and grind, then they’re done. I want more. All I want is my chance to have a man just like you.”

  Her words tugged at his heart. Even though her singleness wasn’t his problem, he knew if he had Nicole, she’d be loyal. He could tell she was the type of woman that rode for her man unless something horrifically tragic was going on, which obviously was the case with Ajalon.

  He told Nicole they should get going. They packed up their things and headed back for the return ride on the ferry. She took a nap on the drive back and dreamt of Rashad and how happy he made her.

  Once he dropped her off outside her house, she invited him inside, even though he had told her good-bye and that he’d try to call her later.

  “Can you stay a little longer, please, Rashad?”

  Nicole’s sweet pleading voice moved his heart. He found himself floating behind this woman, effortlessly following her up the sidewalk, through the front door, and into her living room. He flopped on the couch and remained there deep in thought as she put away the scarf he had given her.

  “Damn, this feels weird.”

  “Why is that?” She went to the kitchen and returned with a chilled can of Colt 45 that he’d bought and kept stored in her refrigerator.

  She popped the top off and handed it to him. Their hands touched and she shivered.

  Usually whenever Rashad was at her house working, they never sat in the living room, but that day Nicole wanted to be close to him. When she sat down, the hem of her dress rose; her thighs were exposed. She felt self-conscious and abruptly grabbed some oversize throw pillows. Rashad stopped her.

  “Never cover up all that beauty. You’re dope, Nicky.”

  “Thanks, Rashad.” Her voice trembled. “You’re amazing. You make me so happy. I’m glad we met.” She grabbed his hand, clenched her eyes shut, and pulled his fingers inside her panties. She released his hand, and he began stroking her. Nicole moaned when she felt Rashad’s fingers stroke her mound like a skilled guitarist. She bit her bottom lip and shuddered. Together they rubbed her until she climaxed. Nicole slipped out of her dress. Rashad unhooked her bra. She slid off her thong. She helped him pull off his t-shirt, blue jeans, and underwear.

  Rashad was instantly into Nicole, kissing her and savoring her restrained sensuality. Her deep desire exploded for him, and her love for him, the love that drizzled from her soul, completely turned him on. She hooked her hands around his neck and kissed him all over his face, his ears, his lips. He loved it, for Rashad had a need to be admired, wanted, and treated like he was everything to a woman.

  Rashad’s dick was rock-hard as Nicole kissed it and then took it deeply into her mouth. She hungrily sucked, stroked, and licked him. He grabbed her head, twisted and turned, and yelled and hollered. The more he shouted, the more excited Nicole became. She knew this moment would go beyond some oral sex.

  Nicole had to have this man completely inside of her.

  They engaged in more vigorous foreplay until he got behind Nicole, grabbed her ass, eagerly plunged in, and pumped her over and over again.

  He hit it from the back and made noises as his thighs slapped against her.

  He cupped her breasts and she cried out to the Lord and gritted her teeth.

  “Oh, Rashad, baby, I love this, I love this, God, I love you.”

  “Whose pussy is this?”

  “It’s yours. It’s all Rashad’s.”

  He heard her declaration and knew she meant it.

  And in her young mind, Rashad coming inside of her was his way of branding Nicole; an identification mark to declare she was his.

  They climaxed simultaneously and fell together in an exhausted heap.

  After they rested, Nicole begged for one more round.

  Rashad and Nicole were at the point of no return.

  Chapter 16

  Four weeks later

  Since the day Eddison and Kiara had unprotected sex, she knew her life was transitioning. It had nowhere else to go but in a different and radical direction.

  Kiara tried to be normal and act like all was well in her life, but it was hard to do.

  That night Rashad came home late.
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  She met her husband at the door. He almost stumbled across his suitcase. A few more shirts and pants were tossed in there. It was now three fourths full.

  “Oh, we’re doing this again?”

  “We are doing this and will continue to do this as long as you stop communicating with me about things that are important.”

  “What, Kiara?”

  “Tonight was our son’s Cub Scouts meeting. You were supposed to take him. I called you. You failed to call me back.”

  “Oh, snap. Totally forgot. Dammit.”

  Rashad had been hanging out at Nicole’s. Even though the work at her house was complete, she invited him over to celebrate. She sent him a naked photo of herself and told him, “Use your key.” He was at her place within twenty minutes. They enjoyed a quickie and Rashad actually did forget his son’s meeting.

  “And that’s why this steadily filled-up suitcase will serve as a reminder. Because as long as you keep hanging out with these hoes, you forget what you have at home.”

  “Why I gotta be hanging out with a hoe?”

  “That’s what I want to know.”

  Kiara smacked Rashad across his face.

  He scowled and walked away.

  “I thought you were so big and bad,” she shouted. “But like a guilty person, all you can do is run away. You won’t even deny anything. At least tell me the same old lie that you always tell me.”

  He twirled around. “I won’t argue with you. I was taking care of some business. A client held a party and I came through there for a minute and forgot about the Cub Scout meeting. I got the days mixed up. Where is Myles?”

  “I’m about to go pick him up.”

  “Where is he?”

  “H-he’s with one of his friends.”

  “Oh, okay. I can go with you to get him. I need to apologize to little man.”

  “Nope, if you weren’t worried about him before, please don’t give a damn now.”

  “Kiara, I don’t wanna hear that. Let’s go.”

  She felt nervous. Myles was with Eddison. And there was no way she was taking Rashad with her. She had actually ended up driving Myles to the Scout activity. And since Eddison’s house was along the way, she picked up her son and stopped by there to see him after Myles’s meeting was over. She was angry that Rashad hadn’t shown up. And it felt good she had somewhere else to go besides her empty house. Once Eddison gave Myles popsicles and then showed him the awesome model train collection in the game room, no amount of begging could get the boy to leave. She decided to let her son hang out at Eddison’s. She trusted him enough to leave Myles at his place for a short while even though it was almost time for him to go to sleep. That gave her time to go home to confront Rashad.

  During the drive home, she imagined what Rashad would do if he knew his son was hanging out with another man.

  But right then Kiara knew Rashad was serious about going with her. She took a good look at him. His clothes were wrinkled. He looked different. Her mouth dropped open. He was wearing a green-and-white UAB Alumni t-shirt. She’d never seen it before. She knew he did not leave out the house with that strange-looking shirt.

  “What in hell is that shirt you’re wearing, Rashad?”

  He glanced at his clothes. His face turned red.

  “Huh? Answer me!” Kiara screamed.

  “Um, it’s a—”

  “Rashad, you lie so fucking much. I know you probably got that shirt from some bitch you’re laying up with. You don’t even like UAB. That’s why I’m glad I—”

  He snatched her by her wrists. “You’re so glad you what?” He looked frightened. “Kiara, what’s really going on with you? Have you done something bad to Myles?”

  “Hurt my own child? Are you crazy?” she screamed.

  “No, but you are!” He squeezed her wrists.

  “Ouch. Let me go. You’re hurting me.”

  “What were you about to say, Kiara? What are you glad about?”

  She tried to knee him in the groin. He jumped back. He twisted her arm even more. She began crying and struggled to get away.

  “Rashad, that fucking hurts. Why do you continue to hurt me? You think I’m supposed to be happy living like this?” She looked at his luggage sprawled on the floor as she shrieked in pain. “You’re physically assaulting me, yet you’re the one who’s done all the dirt; fucking my admin and probably half your damned clients.”

  “For the last time, where is my son? What’d you do to him?”

  “Jesus Christ, I-I haven’t done anything to Myles, you dumb fuck. And I know about UAB. It stands for University of Alabama. Where’d you get that shirt from?”

  “Can’t I buy a stupid shirt?”

  “You are such a liar!”

  He let her go and stormed away. She heard their bedroom door slam and the locks turned.

  “Liar, liar, liar,” she said. She was glad he fled to the room. It was her perfect chance to avoid his questions and pull herself together before she left to pick up Myles.

  By the time she rang Eddison’s doorbell, she had calmed down. He opened the door and she mouthed, “Thanks, baby.”

  He looked pleased to see her. She found Myles. He was watching the Lionel NASCAR trains zip around the tracks. He barely said hello to her.

  “Hey, son. It’s getting late. We have to go.”

  “You hear the choo choo sounds? Can you see the smoke coming out the train, Mommy? This is so much fun. Can I spend the night, please, Mommy?”

  “Um, not tonight, Myles. Maybe some other time.”

  “Eddy is my new best friend.”

  She laughed out loud. Eddison did, too.

  “Kiara, may I see you for a second?” She followed him into his kitchen. He knew Myles was preoccupied so he quickly swept the woman he adored into his arms.

  “That little man is so smart, so engaged. He is amazing. We had a ball. And I fed him a turkey burger so he’s good for the night.”

  “You are amazing. I feel so bad pulling you into all of this—”

  “Shhh,” he said and kissed her lips. “I’m here. I want to be here.” He kissed her again. “If all goes well, you’re going to be my lady one day.”

  He placed his hand on her flat belly and closed his eyes.

  “Are you praying that I’m pregnant and that the baby will be yours?” she asked.

  “It is mine.”

  She turned from him and wrung her hands. This was getting to be too much to deal with. And she felt confused.

  She faced him and said softly, “I-I-I don’t even know if I’m pregnant yet. Plus we wouldn’t know until DNA tells us.”

  “But I can dream, can’t I?”

  She didn’t want to dash his hopes. Ever since she had learned that her period was late, he and Adina were the only people she’d told. Kiara was in a daze. She knew that if she was pregnant, it would be because the Lord allowed it.

  If Eddison turned out to be the father, Kiara would have to deal with that when the time came. She could envision Eddison being a good daddy. But the power of paternity wasn’t in her hands. It was in God’s hands. And that’s what Kiara was afraid of.

  Regardless of what happened, as long as there was a chance that Rashad was the father of her baby, Kiara knew that she had to take control in ways she never imagined.

  Chapter 17

  It was a Wednesday. A Hump Day. Alexis was at work using the women’s restroom. As she sat there, Rashad texted her.

  Where u been? R U ok?

  She had been ignoring him for weeks. But for a moment she felt curious. She picked up her iPhone, the one she used to keep in touch with him, and she called him.

  “Hey, Skillet. It’s about time you answered my calls.”

  “I’ve been busy.”

  “What? You have never been too busy for me. What you been doing?”

  “Living my life; just like you’ve been living yours.”

  Alexis heard some commotion and recognized Nicole and Shyla’s voices as they ent
ered the restroom. They were so busy cackling she figured they didn’t know she was hidden away in a stall. She thought about how she had seen Nicole and him at the restaurant that day hugged up for a photo op, and how the basic chick was always talking trash to her for no reason. It infuriated her. She put Rashad on speaker and let him talk.

  “I ain’t been doing nothing out the ordinary,” he said, his loud voice echoed against the walls.

  “Shhh,” Alexis heard one of the ladies say.

  Alexis continued talking. “It’s me. I know you. If you ain’t fucking one bitch, then I know you’ll be fucking another. That’s how you do—with your fine ass.”

  A hush fell over the restroom.

  “Skillet, you spazzing out.” He laughed. “You ought to let me get some loving again. You act like your legs are closed up to me. You been letting anybody else hit that?”

  “As a married man, you have zero jurisdiction over me, sweetie. You can’t be asking me questions like that.”

  “You better not be fucking anybody but me,” he said.

  Alexis emerged from her stall. She whipped back her weave and stared Nicole dead in the face. The woman’s mouth was all twisted up in anger and disgust.

  “You don’t run me, Rashad!”

  He laughed. “Okay, sweetness. We’ll see. Meanwhile, let’s plan to go see Hayley and do something fun with her.”

  “Sure. Anything for your child . . . I mean anything for you with your childish self.”

  She hung up.

  “Who is Hayley?” Nicole demanded.

  “Mind your business.”